The one with the nuclear tree

• Brek is absent for this session and is missed. 
• Zema tries to leave the portrait of Jonah with Doran at the temple, but the Druid is all "hells to the no!" and tells us to take our trash with us. 
• Druid realizes we're all high as balls and tells us that the mushrooms we took are called "Cocaworm". If the effects get any worse, we should seek her out immediately for help
• Fun fact: these mushrooms are wildly addictive and that there is a herb in the medical center in town that will help with withdrawals. 
• Jonah's wife still lives in town and she tells us to deliver the portrait to her ourselves. 
• There is a newcomer in town, Rhea Mantlemorn. She is in the keep and can potentially assist us in turning Jonah's portrait back into Jonah. 
• We enter the keep via the tunnels. DUN DUN DUNNNN!
• We crawl through the sewers and scare the stable boy with our shit-covered selves. He calls the guards in
• Tylendel uses the horse shower and makes orgasm noises which makes the party uncomfortable. 
• Anise uses a scroll of prestidigitation to clean herself up and changes into formal clothes she had on her. 
• Whill uses prestidigitation to clean himself and uses disguise self to make his clothes nice too
• Balasar has a third fit of throwing useful shit out of his pockets onto the floor
• Guards see religious symbols on Zema, Anise, Ezra and Tylendel. They pull them aside and tell the others to wander the courtyard outside of the stables. 
• Guards are giant dicks.
• Whill sees the Tree of One in the middle of the courtyard... except it is pink. He touches it (with his non-dead hand) and his brain is overwhelmed by images of every tree in the world and his mouth feels like he licked a battery. 
• He falls unconscious
• Balasar, Whill and Brek talk about foliage in general
• DM keeps pulling players into side chats to probably gossip about other players
• Guards take Tylendel's amulet depicting Eliastraee but he just shrugs and calls her a lesser deity. 
• Guards question Anise about the runes on her lapels but she doesn't know what they mean. Talk to Ezra about the symbols of Lathander on his shield. 
• Mage arrives and casts zone of truth on us. He tries to threaten us but Tylendel, firmly believing he is Istishia god of the seas, is all "GUUURL OH NO YOU DI-INT!" and the mage is scared.
• Guard tries to strip Zema, asking why he's all bandaged up. Zema shows wrists and they are very scarred and cut. One of his arms had a panther tattoo. Guards ask if the tattoo on the arm can harm them, and Zema mentions that no it's not at all like Whill's arm that can eat people. 
• Guards panic when they find out that there's a man-eating arm in the party. Zema refuses to point out Whill and the guards are pissed.
• ANOTHER DRUG HOUR HAS PASSED, Anise is now officially free of her high.
• The Tree of One gifts a pink leaf to Whill. 
• Balasar realizes he at some point stripped out of his armor, and so now gets back into it. 
• Anise is talking too fast for the mage so he casts Slow on Ezra, Anise and Tylendel, but only Ezra fails the save. 
• Tylendel bores of these mortals and attempts to summon a tidal wave to purge this town of its idiocy. 
• The mage is officially weirded out by us but basically determines we're not a threat. He lets us in to the keep but will escort us while we stay here. 
• Zema is calling for us to not leave him behind but we're not listening. 
• Ezra sees a giant tree in the courtyard, and must claim it. He runs over and casts Light on the Tree of One. 
• DM pulls Ezra aside into a side chat for a SOOPER long time.
• Ezra is unconscious, as is his Mastiff. 
• The Tree of One basically turns SO VERY FUCKING BRIGHT it blinds everyone, and then it winks out. 
• Most people pass their saving throws of blindness except for Zema and Tarnis, who will be blind for a few hours following the Tree's eruption of light.