The one with the mystery pocket

• Anise tries to herd the party into the tower... but it's like herding cats... on mushrooms. 
• Tarnis gives the one guard that was not blinded by the tree a foot job and knocks him out, which causes enough distraction for Anise to sneak in and take Zema's hand and lead him to safety
• Balasar realizes most of his gear is on the ground outside and politely asks a flustered Momma Anise to come with him. 
• Anise sets up a buddy system for her daycare. Tylendel is matched with an unwilling mage of the keep... he quietly casts Detect Magic to spot anything celestial and godly about Tylendel
• Anise appoints Whill as Balasar's escort to retrieve his gear. He is sidetracked with the Tree of One turning pink again, and Balasar REALLLY wants to empty his pockets once more. 
• Balasar threatens to tell Momma Anise on Whill as he starts heading to the tree, and this puts the fear of Anise into him and he returns to his escorting duties.
• As they reach the stash, Balasar has a pocket-attack and immediately drops EVERYTHING. 
• Distracted guards call us the Wolfensteins and talk about how we're here to kill vampires
• Anise, Zema and Tylendel start heading upstairs to talk to the Governess while Brek waits with an unconscious Ezra. 
• Whill remembers he has a lesser bag of holding and just picks up all of Balasar's things for him and puts them in there. He also spots shiney coins stamped with Tiamat and tries to swipey swiperton them... but Balasar sees and is all AHEM!
• When Whill touched the tiamat coins, the heads glowed like a necklace at a Lady Gaga concert. 
• Ezra comes back to consciousness but only speaks Elvish... thanks to EPIC ROLLS, he speaks some fancy fukn Lord of the Rings Galadriel of Loth'lorien elvish. 
• Balasar now suspects that Whill's pockets are moving... and tries to assist him with depocketing. Whill sees this and uses silent image to make a new pocket appear on Balasar. 
• Anise, Zema and Tylendel meet with the Governess. Before we're allowed to do anything, they want to test us by shoving a Q-Tip on steroids into our ears to test for a mind-controlling worm. 
• Anise tells them to prove the process isn't painful by performing it on one of themselves first. They oblige
• Zema and Anise get tested and pass. Tylendel (a.k.a. Istishia, god of Water) is offended by the torches in the room, mistaking them as symbols to Kossuth, and attempts to turn into water and douse them. He instead casts Tylendel's highest level spell on himself, polymorph, and turns himself into a goat. 
• They cast Hold Creature on Goatlendel, and then he gets tested for the worm and passes. Zema uses rope and puts it around Goatlendel's neck as a leash and Anise holds on to it. 
• ANOTHER HOUR OF DRUG USE HAS PASSED... 6 total so far. 
• Anise gives Governess a 27 part detailed retelling of the party's adventures since the prison. It's so exciting that some guards fall asleep. 
• Whill, Balasar, Ezra and Brek join the party upstairs. 
• Governess starts sassing Balasar but he's having exactly none of her shit. 
• Zema mentions he brought the crown back and the Governess straight up floods her basement as a result.
• It is determined that Ezra's mastiff has the same voice as Ezra. 
• Governess demands that her merchant assistant reward us handsomely for returning the crown. 
• She explains that the Crown is some kinda magic-focusing object that they use to help boost crop growth amongst other secret magicky things in town and its safe return to them is a SOOOOOPER good thing. 
• Governess tells her scribe to jot down the names Anise, Zema, Balasar, Brek and Nix be added to ledger as "saviours of the town"
• Anise suddenly remembers she forgot to tell them the most important part of her 27 part story... that there are vampire enthusiasts inside the keep helping Strahd. She launches into part 28 of her story. 
• Zema knows what the sigil looks like that the followers of Strahd would have on them and draws it for the Governess. 
• Guards take Anise, Brek and Whill (the humaniest of the party) to remove all clothing so they may be inspected for the sigil 
• Whill doesn't want everyone to see his sexy arm, so asks to be disrobed privately. 
• Escobert searches him and discovers skeletal arm and demands to know what it is. He explains that it is a dracolich, and she sets a super elite guard to watch him while she returns to Governess. 
• Anise disrobes privately too and is clean
• Brek tears off his clothes like a stripper in front of everyone and stays naked for way too long
• With Anise away, Goatlendel is left unattended so tries to free himself from the cursed leash of holding. 
• Ezra's mastiff, Rona, sees the flailing rope and bucking goat and wants to play so grabs hold of the rope and starts tugging. 
• Goatlendel rams the mastiff, but it does baby damage. 
• Rona barks excitedly, and Goatlendel realizes he's actually a fainting goat and his legs lock up and he falls over. 
• Balasar notices the magical pocket on him and is wondering where the fuck it came from. His hands are passing through it, but his intelligence roll was too low so he doesn't realize its not real. 
• Anise comes out of her disrobing chamber and sees the ruckus and she casts Nyquil on us. Goatlendel, Rona, a guard, and the merchant counting out our reward fall asleep. 
• ANOTHER HOUR OF DRUG-FUELED EXCITEMENT HAS PASSED. 7 down. 
• Goatlendel rolls shit, so he will remain a goat for another hour. 
• Ezra is scratching his back with his weapon, Balasar offers help by holding his hands up and extending all of his claws. Ezra only speaks and understands Elvish, and Balasar understands none of it. There is confusion as to what the fuck is going on. 
• Governess Hilda asks if there is any other way to find the traitors quicker, other than individually strip searching everyone. Someone mentions the Swamp Dragon Slazarin told us that they had an item in the keep that would help, but that they didn't know how to use it. 
• Hilda mentions some fancy radar-esque gadget on the roof that can be imbued with magic, but we'd need Rhea Mantlemorn to power it. She is in town somewhere, usually doing weird shit that the keep overlooks because she's helpful in other ways. 
• Anise asks for a place to rest and ride out the rest of our highs. 
• Hilda is not impressed that we'd ask for an audience with her while we're all high as balls. 
• Hilda makes a passing comment that almost nobody in the room caught, but that her elite guards might not be alive. 
• We close out some long-standing quests by returning the crown.